One thing that caused my husband to connect to Kateri is her patronage for those who have lost parents. Although he was fortunate to have his parents through the years that are typically considered to be childhood, Paul’s mother passed when he was 18 years old, just 2 weeks after he graduated from high school. His father passed two years later, which was right about the time that I met him.
So I never met my mother- and father-in-law. Also, when we first started dating, although he believed in God, Paul claimed that he and God were not exactly on speaking terms. That made sense to me, at the time. I couldn’t imagine having my parents gone from my life, and I assumed I would be pretty angry if something led to that as a reality for me. At the same time, I wasn’t worried. I could sense that God was still in his heart.
I remember talking to my dad about how difficult it must be for Paul. My dad lost his father at a very young age. My dad was four years old and his mom was still pregnant with her sixth child in 1940 when my grandpa died. In retrospect, a lot of the aspects of my dad’s personality could probably be traced to his life without a father. I remember him telling me about what it was like to become part of my mom’s family, that although her dad would never fill the gap in his life from losing his own father, it was nice to have someone in that fatherly role. He told me that he hoped he could provide at least a little of that for Paul. I hoped so, too.
So when we lost my dad, Paul knew exactly what I needed. He was a rock for me and helped me to navigate that period of adjustment.
I wonder how a young girl like Kateri managed to deal with the reality of losing her parents. How did she, at the age of four, figure out how to keep living life. More remarkably, how did she hold on to the faith that her mother had shared with her? When they say, “the Lord works in mysterious ways,” they aren’t kidding! Imagine God sending those missionaries to her village, even though the chief didn’t want them there. Imagine Kateri having the strength of character to cling to her faith in the face of such persecution. I wonder if it just started as a way to honor her mother.
Lord, please send your comfort and peace to anyone who is suffering with lost parents. Guide us to honor our parents as Kateri honored her mother with her incredible faith.